Definition, 195 Examples, & Lists

Do you struggle to feel sure of yourself? Do people tell you that you lack confidence? Or does negative feedback rattle your sense of self or well-being? Then learning about self-affirmation may be helpful for you. In this article, we’ll first talk about self-affirmation in psychology. Then, we’ll talk about what most people think of when they hear the term ‘self-affirmations’. These explanations can hopefully help you feel more self-assured, resilient, and self-confident.

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Each of us faces numerous failures and threats to our self-worth every single day. It seems then that maintaining a sense of ourselves as being good, worthwhile humans would be a huge task that few of us would be successful at. But that’s not the case. In fact, some researchers propose that we have a psychological protection system—a system that involves a variety of automatic, defensive mental strategies that protect our self-esteem from plummeting in the face of threats (Sherman & Cohen, 2006). In this context, self-affirmations can involve any process (but usually mental processes) that helps us maintain our self-worth.

For example, humans tend to believe that we are responsible for positive outcomes but we are not responsible for negative outcomes. We also diminish the importance of things we have failed at or things we’re not very good at. And, we tend to be overly optimistic about our chances of success, our knowledge, and our competence (Sherman & Cohen, 2006). All of these “rationalizations” actually help us maintain our self-worth. So even though psychologists talk about these defensive self-affirmation strategies with a somewhat critical tone, all-in-all, this psychological process is necessary for us to maintain our sense of self and our well-being.

What is Self Affirmation Theory in psychology?
Self-affirmation theory emerges from a collection of research studies showing that we are self-motivated to maintain our sense of self in the face of threats. We do so in both defensive and in healthy ways (Sherman & Cohen, 2006).

Self-Affirmation Theory takes this one step further by suggesting that when our self-esteem is threatened, we sometimes affirm other parts of ourselves unrelated to the threat or do things that make us feel good about other aspects of ourselves to protect our self-esteem. When we do this, it helps us realize that our self-worth is not contingent on whatever negative feedback or experience we’re having right now. As a result, we might be less likely to be defensive, distort information to fit our worldview, and we can better tolerate threats to our self-esteem (Sherman & Cohen, 2006).

According to psychologists, we can “self-affirm”—or protect our sense of self—by engaging in activities that remind us of who we are. These self-affirmations can involve family, friends, volunteer work, religion, art and music, or other activities that are central to how we see ourselves (Sherman & Cohen, 2006).

Self-affirmation activity
​In psychological studies of self-affirmation, people are asked to:

1. Identify an important core value or life domain
2. Write an essay about it or do an exercise that reminds them of its importance (Sherman & Cohen, 2006).

So when you’re self-worth takes a hit—for example, after rejection, negative feedback, or failure—try doing this activity and reflect on how it makes you feel. Research suggests it can protect your self-esteem, help buffer the effects of stress, and even reduce rumination (Sherman & Cohen, 2006).

If you’d like to give self-affirmations a try, here are some lists to get you started. Just choose a statement that represents how you want to think—it’s even better if this statement also affirms your values. Then, say it to yourself using these guidelines:

• Say it out loud
• Use the present tense
• Focus on the positive rather than the negative
• Choose the statements that are most meaningful to you​

1. I grow and improve every day.
2. My life is full of potential.
3. I have the power to change.​
4. ​​I deserve peace of mind and joy in my life.
5. I am courageous.
6. I am capable of standing up for myself.
7. I feel proud of myself when I ___________.
8. I have many positive qualities including _____________.
9. I have the ability to recover from difficulties.
10. I appreciate the opportunities I’ve been given.
11. My future is bright.
12. I deserve success.​​​
13. I am free to create the life I desire.

1. I approve of myself.
2. I love myself fully.
3. ​I’m allowed to have needs and take up space.
4. I am good at ​__________.
5. I have value.
6. I am at peace with who I am.​
7. I am allowed to take care of myself.
8. I am worthy of love.​
9. There are many things that I love about myself.
10. ​I am enough.​
11. ​My needs and wants are important.​
12. ​I’m worthy of respect and kindness.
13. ​I choose to celebrate my good qualities.
14. ​I’m doing my best and that is enough.​

Try these affirmations to start your day on the right foot.

1. I am in control of how I live my life.
2. I am allowed to take my own path.
3. I will put my energy into things that matter to me.
4. I give myself permission to do what is right for me.
5. Taking small steps every day can help me achieve big goals.
6. I have the potential to succeed.
7. ​I am open to future opportunities.
8. ​I’m in charge of my life.

Try these affirmations to end your day and get to sleep.

1. I am grateful for __________.​
2. I accept myself just the way I am.
3. I am safe and secure here in my bed.
4. I have the power to let things go.
5. I am calm and content.
6. I did my best today and I’ll do my best tomorrow.
7. I deserve this time to sleep.
8. I am open to whatever dreams may come to me while I sleep.
9. I am thankful for this day.
10. I am letting my thoughts go so that my brain can rest.

Do you want to create some more of your own self-affirmations? Here are questions (or fill-in-the-blanks) to reflect on to help you explore what matters to you and get your mind thinking in new and different directions.

Self-affirmations using positive emotions
You could remind yourself of your values, goals, and emotions with these emotion-focused self-affirmations.

1. I am accepting of _________.
2. I am amazed by ________.
3. I am in awe of ________.
4. I am calm and content.
5. I am delighted by ________.
6. I am determined to ________.
7. I am eager to _________.
8. I am enchanted by _______.
9. I feel enthusiasm about ________.
10. I am excited by the possibilities in my life.
11. I am fascinated by _______.
12. I am hopeful about ________.
13. I am intrigued by ________.
14. I am joyful about ______.
15. I feel love and acceptance from ________.
16. I am passionate about _____.
17. I am relaxed when ______.
18. I will treat myself with self-compassion.
19. I feel strong when ______.
20. I feel triumphant when ______.

Want even more self-affirmations? Here are some books to explore:

• ​​10,000+ Positive Affirmations: Affirmations for Health, Success, Wealth, Love, Happiness, Fitness, Weight Loss, Self Esteem, Confidence, Sleep, Healing, Abundance, Motivational Quotes, and Much More!​​
• Daily Rituals: Positive Affirmations to Attract Love, Happiness and Peace
• Badass Affirmations: The Wit and Wisdom of Wild Women