Definition, Ideas, Tips, & Activities to Take Care of Yourself

Self-care is defined as the activities that individuals undertake to improve or restore their own health (Levin & Idler, 1983). Self-care is generally thought to be something we can do on our own without the support of a health professional but life coaches may also help us with self-care. We tend to use self-care as a preventative tool more so than a treatment for illness, but there may be exceptions. 

Self-care is thought to have originated from self-reliant individualism and also from a belief that ill-health could be prevented. Indeed, self-care can have a positive impact on nearly every form of ill-health making it an extremely valuable practice (Levin & Idler, 1983)

Luckily, there are lots of ways we can practice self-care. Here are some ideas to get you started:

Self-care idea 1: Get outdoors
Recent research tells us that daily contact with nature can help us reduce anxiety and depression while also helping us improve our health (Soga, Gaston, & Yamaura, 2017). Indeed, so many things about the outdoors can improve our health—the sun, the fresh air, the soil, the scent of trees. Exposing ourselves to these things regularly is one way to take better care of ourselves.

Self-care idea 2: Listen to soothing music
Did you know that listening to relaxing music can reduce cortisol (an important stress hormone)? Well, research shows it can (Khalfa et al., 2003). More specifically, binaural beats (music with two tones played at slightly different frequencies to each ear) may be helpful for increasing focus (Garcia-Argibay, Santed, & Reales, 2019).

Self-care idea 3: Practice deep breathing
By practicing deep breathing, we activate our parasympathetic nervous system—our calming ‘rest and digest’ system. One simple breathing practice is box breathing. Box breathing involves breathing in for a count of four, holding for a count of four, breathing out for a count of four, and then holding for a count of four. Try this for a few rounds to see how it makes you feel.

Self-care idea 4: Build the skills that generate happiness
Much of what makes us happy comes from our thoughts, emotions, and actions. That means we can learn to be happier. We can do things like practice gratitude or learn how to regulate our emotions. And if we build happiness skills, we can take better care of ourselves.

Self-care idea 5: Try mindfulness meditation
​Mindfulness involves paying attention to our thoughts, feelings, and surroundings without judgement. Mindful meditation can be a helpful way to take care of and soothe our minds. Check out the video below for a self-care meditation.

When it comes to self-care, it’s important to keep in mind that everyone is different. One person might benefit from meditation while another person benefits more from changes to their diet. Keep these self-care tips in mind when creating your self-care plan or routine. 

​Self-care tip 1: Try out different self-care activities
Sometimes people get frustrated when they try a self-care activity—maybe an activity that tons of people have been raving about—and it doesn’t really help them or feel like the right fit. If that sounds like you, then it can be helpful to try out some other strategies. For example, things like mindfulness and eating vegan don’t actually work for everyone. Try out some different self-care activities (we list some more below) to find what works for you.

​Self-care tip 2: Build self-awareness around your self-care
Learning to pay attention to what is helpful and not helpful can take practice. For example, maybe we’ve been exercising every day but are starting to feel worn down. In that case, exercise might not be the type of self-care we need right now. In general, paying attention to how our thoughts and behaviors make us feel—in the short-term and the longer term—can help us make the most of self-care.

​Self-care tip 3: Be kind to yourself in the process
Be careful not to be too strict or harsh with yourself when it comes to your self-care routine. The goal is to be nice to ourselves so let’s not accidentally get caught up in forcing ourselves to do things that we’re too tired or busy to do. And let’s not judge ourselves for taking a day (or even a week) off when we need it. Remember, self-kindness is an important part of self-care.

Still need more self-care activities you can do. Here are some good ones to try out:

Self-care activity 1: Visualize a better future
Lay down comfortably, close your eyes, and imagine yourself in a future that has everything you want. Imagine the people who are there and the location you are in. Try to feel how good it makes you feel.

Self-care activity 2: Cultivate positive emotions
To generate positive emotions, we can try thinking positive, being more optimistic, savoring the good moments, or even doing loving-kindness meditation. Boosting positive emotions can fuel an upward spiral of positivity, helping us feel better, improve social interactions, and so on (Fredrickson, Mancuso, Branigan, & Tugade, 2000).

Self-care activity 3: Do a digital detox
You probably already know that spending too much time on your phone isn’t so good for our well-being. In fact, research shows that Internet use is associated with more depression and loneliness (Kraut et al., 1998). To learn some tips for having a better relationship with technology, check out my book, Outsmart Your Smartphone.
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Self-care activity 4: Do any activity you enjoy
In Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), it is suggested that engaging in pleasant activities is a good way to soothe ourselves (Linehan, 1993). This could be gardening, spending time with friends, cooking, or painting—whatever makes us feel good. 

Self-care activity 4: Reduce your stress
Our bodies are designed to handle short bursts of stress but in the modern world, we are stressed more often than our body can really handle. As a result, our stress system can get out of whack. So take time to practice stress reduction techniques and if you’ve been stressed for a while, consider doing a stress detox.

Alright, so now you’ve got some ideas about the things you can do to care for yourself. But what kinds of goodies or products might help you with your self-care? Or, what can you get a friend or family member that is struggling with self-care? Here are some of my absolute favorite self-care gifts.

Self-care gifts:

• Oil Diffuser. These are great for reducing air-born toxins when essential oils like lavender, bergamot, and rosemary are used. (Don’t forget to get organic essential oils).
• Acupressure Pad. This can help relieve back pain and loosen tight muscles. It creates a warming, tingling sensation after about 20 minutes.
• Dry Brush. This exfoliates the skin and can aid detoxification of the body.
• Water Filter. Get those toxins, chemicals, and chlorine out of your drinking water to aid health. (This is the one I have.)
• Herbal Tea. Great for calming the body, aiding detox, and improving liver function.
• Cold-Brew Tea Maker & Bottle. This is a great way to make herbal tea on the go and drink it all day long.
• Tea Pot with Infuser. To make a few cups of hot tea all at once.
• Cupping Therapy Set. Use the silicone cups to loosen tight muscles and trouble spots.
• Bees Wax Food Wraps. Keep your veggies fresh without wrapping them in harmful plastic.
• Bath Salts. For a relaxing bath that helps replenish the body’s salt.
• Adaptogens. Adaptogens are plants that help the body manage stress. Some effective adaptogens include Ashwagandha, Holy Basil, Eleuthero, Jiaogulan, Rhodiola, & Ginsing (Winston, 2019).

One way to make sure you’re prioritizing self-care is to plan for self-care Sunday. Self-care Sundays are just a day that you devote to self-care. It’s sort of rest time that helps us feel rejuvenated and capable of braving the next week ahead. That means no working or dealing with stressful stuff—just kicking back and relaxing.

What might you do on a self-care Sunday? Here are some ideas:

• Read a book.
• Write a story.
• Garden.
• Spend time with friends.
• Go for a hike.
• Do a craft project.
• Visit with family.
• Go to the spa.
• Get a massage.
• Do some yoga.
• Get some alone time.
• Cook your favorite meal or dessert.
• Explore your town or city.
• Spend some time in a botanical garden, community garden, or park.

If self-care Sunday doesn’t work for you, it might be helpful to explore other plans for self-care. Try to set aside some time for activities that improve your health and well-being. Pick up a self-care planner or self-care journal to stay on track. Or, block out time for your self-care in your calendar just like you would block out time for any other to-do. These tips can help you stay on track.

Need some more help with self-care? Here are some books that can help you learn more.

If you’re looking for some online self-care activities, we have some good ones to try. Check these out:

If you want to learn more about self-care, you may be interested in these articles:

• ​​​​Fredrickson, B. L., Mancuso, R. A., Branigan, C., & Tugade, M. M. (2000). The undoing effect of positive emotions. Motivation and emotion, 24(4), 237-258.
• Garcia-Argibay, M., Santed, M. A., & Reales, J. M. (2019). Efficacy of binaural auditory beats in cognition, anxiety, and pain perception: a meta-analysis. Psychological Research, 83(2), 357-372.
• ​Khalfa, S., BELLA, S. D., Roy, M., Peretz, I., & Lupien, S. J. (2003). Effects of relaxing music on salivary cortisol level after psychological stress. Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences, 999(1), 374-376.​
• ​Kraut, R., Patterson, M., Lundmark, V., Kiesler, S., Mukophadhyay, T., & Scherlis, W. (1998). Internet paradox: A social technology that reduces social involvement and psychological well-being?. American psychologist, 53(9), 1017.
• Levin, L. S., & Idler, E. L. (1983). Self-care in health. Annual review of public health, 4(1), 181-201.​
• ​Linehan, M. M. (1993). Skills training manual for treating borderline personality disorder. Guilford press.
• Soga, M., Gaston, K. J., & Yamaura, Y. (2017). Gardening is beneficial for health: A meta-analysis. Preventive medicine reports, 5, 92-99.
• ​​Winston, D. (2019). Adaptogens: herbs for strength, stamina, and stress relief. Simon and Schuster.​